We are often berated with the word CONTROL … in meditation you learn to control your mind, through physical exercise you learn to control your body, we are told to control our eating, our spending, our behavior, our temper, our children, etc.  There is even a specific Bach Flower Essence, one of only 38, that is for fear of losing control!

I was just reading an article that says that once we recognize moments when we react out of a fear of being out of control we may begin to realize that control leads to a more civilized society (http://www.michaeleducationalfoundation.com/michael-system-basics/overview-of-the-michael-teaching/soul-perception-on-the-physical-plane).  Something made me stop and begin to ask a ton of questions – if control leads to a more civilized society then what does civilized mean? Does civilized leave room for creativity? Where do we draw the line between controlling ourselves and others controlling us?  How much of control is born from society, religion, government imposing the will of wanting to have a non-questioning and docile community?

There are 2 ways to perceive the word control – I control myself (list mentioned earlier) which is touted as a positive thing to achieve and others control me, which most people reject immediately and completely.  Where is the line drawn and what’s the difference?   If I have total control over my body and mind what would my reaction when new feelings/thoughts/questions begin to arise?  If I control my children based on the rules of a more civilized society (don’t run in the grocery store, don’t throw mud at others, keep your hands to yourself, ask for what you want politely, don’t interrupt an adult when they are speaking, work hard to get approval, etc) and they grow up to be a polite and hard-working adult in society, then how does transformation come about and who actually tells the truth rather than simply what people want to hear?

I don’t pretend to answer this question but I would love to begin a dialogue … what is the value of control and what is the relationship between control and transformation?

The other day while writing in my diary after a session of alternative therapy and in the process of reading a book about an awakening experience, I began to write and repeat in my head a phrase that my mentor taught me 'In this world of oneness I am whole, In this world of wholeness I am one'.  This brought up a whirlwind of questions at the moment...  If there is only Source and I am not the doer where does individuality fit in?  Does co-creation exist or is that something Source wants me to believe to imagine I have more freedom to design my destiny the way I want it?  If I really am not the doer that would insinuate that I am not responsible for my actions because it was never a choice to perform the actions channeled through me.
At that moment I got an image in my head of a cake.  So then am I a whole piece of cake that comes from the whole and homogenous with the whole but can be separated OR am I just a crumb within the cake that is indistinguishable from the rest?
I do not aim to answer these questions at this moment but continue to ask and be curious - never desisting in questioning what is and my perception of what is!