I realized last night that by SPEAKING MY TRUTH I am not hurting my loved ones or myself, rather I am helping free us all from underlying assumptions, resentments that arise from not speaking up and the rejection of intimacy. By allowing myself to see my ego-self and its resistance to admitting that there are two sides to every discussion, I opened myself to a kind of compassion I perhaps have never felt before. That compassion led to the understanding of the DIFFERENCES in each beautiful being inhabiting this world.
Every single being is an individual, has personal triggers, is deeply saddened by certain events and set off in rage by others. This can be understood by looking at nature. What makes mother nature resilient? Diversity is one of the greatest strengths that allows for adaptation in nature. In humans this is no different...it allows adaptation , beauty and evolution. Imagine each being as a kind of fruit and try this experiment. Make a plate of many different fruits and sit down with a friend to play. Try each fruit individually, noticing the scent, texture, taste and sensations it creates for you. It would be even a greater experiment if you put some of your favorite fruits along with one or two that you are not particularly fond of. As you play with this, be mindful that each fruit has not only its own scent, texture and flavor but each also has a very individual internal composition of nutrients, minerals, sugars, etc. See if you can appreciate the qualities of each fruit even if the flavor is not your favorite.
Follow this playing up with a short Metta (type of prayer) session before you go to bed that night. First create a prayer in your own mind wishing for yourself 3 things: May I be peaceful, May I be Loved, May I be Free (filling in whatever words you wish for yourself in this moment). Then imagine a loved one and send the same prayer to them: May you be peaceful, May you be Loved, May you be Free. Now imagine a stranger, someone you have seen before but really don't know or have particular feelings for and send them the same prayer: May you be peaceful, May you be Loved, May you be Free. Next imagine a person you believe has brought you some kind of suffering or that for some reason you don't like to be around and send them the same prayer: May you be peaceful, May you be Loved, May you be Free. Finally, send Metta to the whole world wishing all beings the same you wish for yourself: May we be peaceful, May we be Loved, May we be Free. Simply be aware of the internal ease or struggle as you recite these prayers in your mind.
Now take the next week to see if you can pay special attention to what triggers different emotions in you and in your loved ones. Notice how you may see things one way while another person sees them completely differently... and the best part is that is OK! By becoming familiar with our own triggers and those of our loved ones we can begin to have compassion for the innocence surrounding each being and the fact that very often rage, sadness, hatred, etc. surges from very deeply hidden parts of us that we are often not even aware of AND preferences are the spice of life not a reason to isolate ourselves and reject the amazing experience that comes with opening our hearts to intimacy.
Every single being is an individual, has personal triggers, is deeply saddened by certain events and set off in rage by others. This can be understood by looking at nature. What makes mother nature resilient? Diversity is one of the greatest strengths that allows for adaptation in nature. In humans this is no different...it allows adaptation , beauty and evolution. Imagine each being as a kind of fruit and try this experiment. Make a plate of many different fruits and sit down with a friend to play. Try each fruit individually, noticing the scent, texture, taste and sensations it creates for you. It would be even a greater experiment if you put some of your favorite fruits along with one or two that you are not particularly fond of. As you play with this, be mindful that each fruit has not only its own scent, texture and flavor but each also has a very individual internal composition of nutrients, minerals, sugars, etc. See if you can appreciate the qualities of each fruit even if the flavor is not your favorite.
Follow this playing up with a short Metta (type of prayer) session before you go to bed that night. First create a prayer in your own mind wishing for yourself 3 things: May I be peaceful, May I be Loved, May I be Free (filling in whatever words you wish for yourself in this moment). Then imagine a loved one and send the same prayer to them: May you be peaceful, May you be Loved, May you be Free. Now imagine a stranger, someone you have seen before but really don't know or have particular feelings for and send them the same prayer: May you be peaceful, May you be Loved, May you be Free. Next imagine a person you believe has brought you some kind of suffering or that for some reason you don't like to be around and send them the same prayer: May you be peaceful, May you be Loved, May you be Free. Finally, send Metta to the whole world wishing all beings the same you wish for yourself: May we be peaceful, May we be Loved, May we be Free. Simply be aware of the internal ease or struggle as you recite these prayers in your mind.
Now take the next week to see if you can pay special attention to what triggers different emotions in you and in your loved ones. Notice how you may see things one way while another person sees them completely differently... and the best part is that is OK! By becoming familiar with our own triggers and those of our loved ones we can begin to have compassion for the innocence surrounding each being and the fact that very often rage, sadness, hatred, etc. surges from very deeply hidden parts of us that we are often not even aware of AND preferences are the spice of life not a reason to isolate ourselves and reject the amazing experience that comes with opening our hearts to intimacy.
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